Baby cakes,

Mommy missed you just like she has everyday since you left me. Why did you leave Mommy? I did the best I could and loved you like I’ve never loved before. I worked hard to be able to give you everything within my power. I would have given my life to ensure your happiness. I still would. Now I’m left empty; missing the love of my life. There are small things that give me comfort where I can feel you with me. I had your gray blanket with me for awhile after the hospital. Now I wear your pretty white headband around my wrist. It gives me comfort when I’m feeling sad. I light a candle for you; holding you in my heart as I do.

The other day I was getting ready for bed with your Daddy and I could smell your spit up on the blanket in Daddy’s bed. As yucky as it sounds, it gave me comfort. It was a smell that I had grown accustomed to. As any parent would grow accustomed to, along with the drool you left all over Daddy’s sheets. Goodness, you started to really drool the last few weeks. But that didn’t stop Mommy from giving you tons of kisses.

Baby, I miss you. Know that you are always in my thoughts and in my heart. I love you to the moon and back. Nothing can or ever will take that away from me, from us.




Gemma Nova 2 months picture, February 25th, 2018


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